January 18th - First Ship Landing

On this day, in 1911, Eugene Burton Ely landed his flying jalopy on the USS Pennsylvania and nearly became the 400th man to not land his plane on a ship. Instead, Ely succeeded where others had failed, however, he still doesn't understand women (aka los femininas).

Ely was born in Iowa and raised in Iowa. He graduated from, you guessed it, Iowa State University. By this time he was sick of Iowa so he moved to California in the hope that it would one day have an Austrian movie-star governor. He never saw this dream fulfilled as he died in 1911, some 95 years before the election of Governor Schwarzenegger.

 

Ely didn't let this get him down. He powered on and married Mabel Hall, who was built like a marble hall. A friend purchased an early bi-plane and Ely offered to fly it. He did not have any training because those were the days when men were men and women were built like brick shit-houses. Ely thought that flying a plane would be as easy as driving a car. He was right; he crashed the plane just like he crashed his car. Ely was a man of honour so he purchased the wreck from his friend, and so was born the most difficult aeroplane selling scheme ever devised.

 

Ely repaired the plane and learnt to fly it properly without all the hassle of colliding with the ground. Using this "avoiding the ground" technique Ely began to enjoy flying and journeyed to the bright lights of Winnipeg to fly in an exhibition. After the flying exhibition he got his pilot's license.

The Great Streak Ely is the holder of three great achievements. In 1910, he launched his aircraft from a temporary platform erected on the USS Birmingham. The plane left the end of the platform and dipped close enough to the ocean to touch the water. This was probably Ely showing off. His second achievement was in 1911 when he landed his plane on a ship using a tail-hook system. After the landing he told the media that "It was easy enough. I think the trick could be successfully turned nine out of ten times."

 

This ratio was good enough for navies around the world. These first feeble efforts were enough to cause the investment of a tonne of money in aircraft carriers and bring war and pestilence on innocent people around the world.

 

Ely knew he would fly until his death. He believed that early in his life. He believed it even more as his plane plummeted toward the Earth at an exhibition in Georgia. Ely broke his one golden rule to "avoid the ground" and this resulted in a broken neck.

 

His third achievement was his fulfilling and contented life.