October 7th - Hebrew Calendar Epoch

On this day, in 3761 BC, the Hebrew/Jewish calendar began. The calendar is used for remembering to do particularly Jewey things, like not celebrating Christmas. It included important dates and practical day-to-day information like which psalms to read, and what is a psalm anyway.

Originally, the calendar was used for all aspects of life, but the Jews realised there was more to life than reading psalms and not celebrating Christmas. Some time in the first century BC, the Jews abandonned their God and switched to the Julian calendar.

The calendar was based on the movement of the Sun and Moon so the Jewish Year varied in length, and ran in a 19 year cycle of 235 lunar months. In Jewish communities it is considered the greatest achievement to know what day it is.

A Jewish week is seven days. Thanks be to all the Jewish Gods. But the days of the week are simply named after the number of the day. So it is acceptable, in Hebrew, to say "I'll see you at seven on seven."

Due to the difference between the length of twelve lunar months and a solar year the calendar introduces the idea of a "leap month", which isn't worth explaining.

If you like to party then this calendar is for you. It has four different dates that mark the new year. Unfortunately, you do need a PhD in relativity to figure out when they are. It is required by Jewish law that all invitations to Jewish new year celebrations include a mathematical proof of the celebration's existence.

The final nail in the coffin of the Jewish calendar was that it was always unclear where Christmas should be.

It is clear that the Jewish calendar was created by someone who didn't own a watch. And even if they did, they wouldn't be able to use it because they have no concept of time whatsoever.